Go on a tour today and see more critters than you can shake a stick at!
🐊 A Totally Real, 100% Legitimate, Possibly Life-Changing Adventure
Ever wanted to stare into the eyes of an alligator and wonder if today’s the day you meet your maker? Or maybe you dream of trudging through knee-deep swamp water while a raccoon eyes your snacks? Well, you’re in luck!
Led by Florida’s most qualified tour guide (probably), Nick M. “Alligator” Bundy will take you deep into the heart of the Everglades. You’ll hike scenic trails (watch your step), glide across miles of swamp on an airboat (no refunds if we capsize), and visit real alligator communities filled with thousands of gators who may or may not respect your personal space.
But that’s not all—on this one-of-a-kind tour, you might witness a wild McRib in its natural habitat, accidentally join the Swamp Critter Jamboree, or unlock Florida’s greatest mystery: why the signs say “DO NOT FEED OR MOLEST THE ALLIGATORS” in the first place.
So grab your boots, sign a totally unnecessary waiver, and prepare for an unforgettable adventure with the Florida Man himself.
Book now! (Before the authorities shut this down.)
American Alligator 🐊 The Unofficial King of Florida Towering, ancient, and utterly unbothered, the American alligator is the true ruler of the Everglades. They’ve seen it all—tourists getting too close, Florida Baby trying to ride them, and, of course, the incident that led to the infamous “DO NOT FEED OR MOLEST THE ALLIGATORS” signs that are all over Florida. (We all know who’s responsible for that.) Despite their prehistoric power, gators mostly just want to bask in the sun and ignore the chaos around them. But in Florida, peace is fleeting—because where there’s fresh water, there’s a sign. And where there’s a sign, there’s a Florida Man wondering just how serious it really is.
Nick "Alligator" Bundy 🐊 The Ultimate Florida Man A living legend, a walking headline, and the human embodiment of "Hold my beer," Nick "Alligator" Bundy thrives in the untamed chaos of the Sunshine State. Whether he's wrangling gators, cooking up bizarre swamp delicacies, or engaging in deeply questionable science experiments, Bundy approaches life with reckless enthusiasm and an unshakable belief that everything is worth trying at least once. With a heart as big as his bad ideas, he’s both the hero and the cautionary tale of his own story. Armed with boundless confidence, a slight disregard for personal safety, and an army of oddball critter friends, Bundy doesn’t just live in Florida—he is Florida.
Flamingos 🦩 The Divas of the Everglades Flamingos aren’t just birds—they’re an attitude. Tall, pink, and perpetually judging, these feathered Floridians strut through the swamp like they own the place (because honestly, they kind of do). With legs longer than a Florida summer and a resting glare that says “get it together,” they bring a level of elegance that the rest of the swamp… does not. Often found standing on one leg, they claim it’s for balance—but let’s be real, it’s just to show off. Whether they’re flocking together or side-eyeing Bundy’s latest antics, one thing is clear: in a state full of wild creatures, flamingos remain the undisputed icons of Florida fabulousness.
Frogs 🐸 The Swamp’s Silent Observers Among the chaos of the swamp, the frogs remain ever-present, ever-watching, and completely unfazed. They don’t talk, they don’t judge—they just exist, witnessing every questionable decision Bundy makes with an eerie, knowing stillness. Though they seem like ordinary frogs, their presence suggests they know things—perhaps too much. Are they simply swamp dwellers, or are they the true masterminds of it all? No one can say for sure, but one thing is clear: wherever Bundy goes, the frogs are already there. Watching. Waiting. Blinking.
Mice 🥚 Nature’s Most Mysterious Egg-Layers Often overlooked but crucial to the swamp’s ecosystem, mice are best known for their delicate nests filled with freshly laid mouse eggs. Despite what so-called "scientists" may claim, these tiny creatures continue to defy mainstream biology, hatching their young just like birds—because of course they do. If you ever stumble upon a clutch of pristine mouse eggs, consider yourself lucky. Just don’t disturb them—mother mice are very protective, and arguing with them (or the facts) is a losing battle.
Rita the Dancing Squirrel 💃 The Swamp’s Tiny Choreography Genius With boundless energy and an eye for precision, Dancing Squirrel is the mastermind behind Alligator Bundy’s viral dance moves. This tiny but fierce choreographer scurries through the swamp, perfecting routines with lightning-fast footwork and an attitude that says, "Again! But with more feeling!" Though small in stature, Dancing Squirrel’s presence is huge—whether critiquing Bundy’s rhythm with an exasperated tail flick or busting out moves that defy the laws of both physics and rodent dignity. If there’s a perfectly timed twirl or an unexpected groove, you can bet Dancing Squirrel was behind it.
Trash Pandas 🦝 The Swamp’s Sneakiest Entrepreneurs Clever, resourceful, and morally flexible, the Trash Panda is Florida’s ultimate hustler. By night, they dig through garbage with the precision of a master chef selecting ingredients. By day, they scam tourists out of snacks with those big, innocent eyes—don’t fall for it. These masked bandits operate with no fear and no shame, uniting under the sacred law of Finders Keepers. Whether they’re raiding Bundy’s cooler, sneaking into a gator’s sunbathing spot, or running a highly questionable swap meet behind a Waffle House, one thing’s for sure—if there’s trouble, a Trash Panda is already involved.
Bears 🐻 The Swamp’s One True Scientist Bears may not have the flair for drama that the other critters do, but they bring something just as valuable—scientific accuracy. The swamp’s resident bear is here to keep things grounded, offering a no-nonsense approach to life (and sometimes, dance). A rare sight in the wild, this bear prefers to mind its own business—unless there’s a dance party. Then, you’ll find it moonwalking through the background, adding a touch of unexpected rhythm to the swamp's chaotic atmosphere.
Skunk Ape 🦶 The Elusive, Aromatic Legend Lurking in the Florida swamps (and occasionally photobombing Alligator Bundy’s adventures), Skunk Ape is part myth, part mystery, and 100% best bud. Despite his legendary status, he’s just a laid-back guy who loves hanging with Bundy, dodging cryptid hunters, and embracing his natural musk. Silent but expressive, he communicates mostly through grunts, shrugs, and the occasional deep sigh when Bundy gets himself into trouble. Though blurry in most photos, his loyalty is always crystal clear. If you spot a towering, shaggy figure in the background—congrats! You’ve just had a rare Skunk Ape sighting.
Gaytor 🌈 The Swamp’s Most Stylish Sensation Serving looks, wisdom, and just a little bit of drama, Gaytor is the Alligator Bundy world’s resident fashion-forward reptile. With a dazzling sense of style and a flair for the theatrical, he turns every murky swamp into his personal runway. Whether he’s offering sage life advice, throwing the perfect side-eye, or critiquing the questionable fashion choices of his fellow critters, Gaytor always keeps it real—and fabulous. He may have the sharpest teeth in the bayou, but his real weapon is his wit. A born trendsetter, he believes that confidence is the best accessory (though a little sequins never hurt). If you hear a sassy chuckle echoing through the cypress trees, rest assured—Gaytor has arrived, and he’s about to spill the tea.
Bees 🐝 The Buzzing Faces of Florida In a totally scientifically accurate twist, all the bees in the swamp now bear the unmistakable face of Nick "Alligator" Bundy. How did this happen? Well, legend has it Bundy, in a moment of questionable decision-making, spotted a hole in a bee hive and thought, "Hmm, a hole... I know what to stick in there..." And before you could say "swarm," every bee in the swamp looked just like him. Now, these industrious little critters buzz around the swamp with Bundy’s face plastered on their tiny little heads, spreading pollen, dancing wildly, and occasionally pausing for a selfie. How did it happen? Who knows. What we do know is that once Bundy’s face got involved, there was no going back.
McRibs 🍖 The Elusive Delicacy of the Wild A rare and majestic creature, the wild McRib roams the Florida wilderness, appearing only when in season. Known for its tender, smoky meat and a natural coat of tangy barbecue sauce, this legendary beast is both revered and hunted by those who crave its fleeting presence. If you’re lucky, you might catch a glimpse of a mama McRib nursing her tiny McRiblets, teaching them how to graze on tangy sauce deposits and evade fast-food menu rotations. But beware—like all things in Florida, their existence defies logic, science, and common sense.
Dancing Gators Not all gators just sit around looking menacing—some of them get down. The Dancing Gators of the Everglades are a rare and mysterious breed, known for their unexpected ability to bust a move when the swamp gets to swayin’. Some say it’s the humidity, others blame the moonlight, but Alligator Bundy knows the truth: these gators were born to groove. Legend has it that deep in the Everglades, if you listen closely, you can hear the distant sound of a funky bassline, and if you’re lucky, you might just spot a gator throwing it back in the moonlight. Are they trained professionals? No. Do they respect the art of choreography? Absolutely not. But when the Swamp Critter Jamboree kicks off, you better believe the Dancing Gators are front and center, shaking their tails like nobody’s watching—except, of course, everybody is watching.
Swamp Critter Jamboree 🎶🐊 The Wildest Party in the Everglades Deep in the heart of the swamp, when the moon is just right and the gators start tapping their tails, something magical happens—the Swamp Critter Jamboree. No one knows exactly why it starts, but when it does, every creature in the Everglades drops what they’re doing (even if it’s highly illegal) and joins in. Florida Man leads the charge, dancing wildly as flamingos strut, trash pandas twirl, and even the frogs—normally silent and judging—give a little hop in rhythm. It’s chaos. It’s beauty. It’s Florida. And if you ever stumble upon one, don’t ask questions—just dance. Critter Jamboree
Manatee The gentle, blubbery sea cow of Florida’s waterways, the manatee is a peaceful, slow-moving creature that has been mistaken for many things throughout history—most notably, mermaids. That’s right, sailors of old (possibly suffering from heat stroke and questionable levels of rum consumption) once gazed upon these floating potatoes and thought, Yep, that’s a beautiful woman right there. Even Christopher Columbus allegedly made some very strange observations about them. What exactly did he say? We don’t know, and honestly, it’s probably best we don’t dig too deep into that. Today, manatees can be found lounging in warm waters, munching on seagrass, and continuing to be deeply confused by their historical reputation. If you see one on your tour, be sure to wave—just don’t expect them to sing you a siren’s song.
Pythons Florida’s python problem? Completely manufactured. That’s right—while the scientists blame irresponsible pet owners, the real truth is much simpler: Florida Man put them there on purpose to make the tours more exciting. I mean, what’s a swamp adventure without a 15-foot snake squaring up against a prehistoric lizard in an all-out battle for reptilian dominance? Now these slithery invaders are everywhere, wrapping around trees, lurking in the marsh, and making every airboat ride just a little more thrilling. Will you see a python on your tour? Probably. Will you witness an epic gator vs. snake showdown? If you’re really lucky. Either way, remember: we take no responsibility for any wrestling matches that break out in the wild… unless they look really cool.
Florida Baby 🍼 The Chaos Goblin of the Swamp Small in size but mighty in Florida energy, Florida Baby is a barefoot whirlwind of chaos, fearlessness, and questionable decision-making. Raised by the wild, fueled by instinct (and maybe a little Gator Milk), this swamp gremlin fears nothing—gators, lightning, theme park prices—you name it. Florida Baby operates on pure adrenaline, always one moment away from wrestling a snake or starting a backyard fireworks display. If you hear tiny, determined footsteps followed by absolute mayhem, you know Florida Baby is on the loose.
Florida Woman 💄 Beauty, Chaos, and a Dash of Unhinged The swamp’s most stunning yet unpredictable force of nature, Florida Woman is equal parts Southern charm, hurricane energy, and questionable life choices—all wrapped up in an irresistibly attractive package. She’s the only person who can match Alligator Bundy’s wild antics, often out-Florida-ing him with stunts that leave even the gators impressed. As the proud mother of Florida Baby, she’s raising the next generation of chaos with love, instinct, and the occasional roadside wrestling match. Whether she’s sweet-talking her way out of trouble or running straight into it, one thing’s for sure—Florida Woman always makes an entrance.
Alistair Wallaby Bundy 🦘 The Refined Rascal Hailing from the misty moors of "somewhere vaguely British," Alistair Wallaby Bundy is Alligator Bundy’s eccentric uncle and self-proclaimed expert in everything from fine tea etiquette to highly suspicious get-rich-quick schemes. With a posh accent and the confidence of a man who’s never once questioned himself, Alistair often appears unannounced, offering unsolicited wisdom that may or may not be legally sound. Dressed in his finest (and only) tweed jacket, he navigates the swamp with the grace of a drunken heron, dodging responsibility while spinning elaborate tales of his past adventures—including that time he was allegedly knighted by a confused tourist at a Renaissance fair. Is he a genius? A conman? A long-lost aristocrat? The answer is yes—according to Alistair.
Uncle Liborio 🌴 Miami’s Smoothest Operator Uncle Liborio is a true Miami legend—part philosopher, part hustler, and 100% Cuban charisma. Whether he’s sipping cafecito, dancing salsa, or explaining why everything was better back in his day, he brings a level of swagger that even the alligators respect. He’s seen it all, done most of it, and has at least three stories about that one time he almost made it big. With a heart as warm as the Miami sun and a closet full of guayaberas, Uncle Liborio is the only man who can outtalk Bundy and make it look effortless.
The Cop 🚔 Florida Man’s Eternal Shadow Stoic, relentless, and forever one step behind, The Cop is on a never-ending mission: bring Florida Man to justice… or at least try. With a badge full of broken dreams and a radio that only crackles bad news, he’s the unsung hero (or tragic figure) of the Everglades. No matter how fast Bundy runs, how deep he hides, or how wildly he swerves in an airboat, The Cop is always there—silent, watching, waiting. Will he ever catch his elusive target? Or is he doomed to chase Florida’s slipperiest outlaw forever? One thing’s for sure: this won’t end today.